Listening to: Take Me Somewhere Nice
Reading: Past Messages
Disappearing is easy, ignore this phone call, don't respond to this message, look the other way, ignore the outside world, walk the other way, be cold, be crass.
But every once in a while we get that one friend that refuses to let go, that refuses to be ignored and that against all odds continuously knocks at your door. I have such a friend and I know for a fact that I am far from deserving. I continuously drop from the face of the earth, I sometimes don't answer her phone call, I ignore her messages and sometimes I speak ill of her. If I am being honest, sometimes I am ashamed of her and that in turn creates a poison so thick inside of me that I feel sick.
But she always just smiles and smacks me in the head, pulls me from my cave and pushes me into the outside world. She shrugs off my excuses and reintroduces me to the outside world filled with sunshine and laughter. She kicks down the door with a mighty kick, laughs at my ridiculous expression and sticks around like glue.
Until I recede back into emptiness she continues to smile, listens to my problems and tells me hers in return. And suddenly I'm alive, lit with a fondness I hadn't realized was there and it's like everything is old but new; a familiar sensation. We run through the streets, the stores and we blare our music too loud and make stupid faces at other children. She offers to pay and sometimes I'll refuse, other times I attempt to pay and in the end we'll have a pissing match over who gets to pay until we laugh till it hurts.
She isn't pretty and neither am I, we aren't best friends but we could be. She cares about me in ways other friends never did. And I am proud and damn happy that she refused to be driven off.
Perhaps I will call her today, it's been a while and I intend to remedy that.